purgatory

Have you ever seen a one trick pony in the field so happy and free? If you've ever seen a one trick pony then you've seen me,
I come and stand at every door, Then you've seen me, I always leave with less than I had before, Then you've seen me, bet I can make you smile when the blood, it hits the floor, Tell me, friend, can you ask for anything more?


I've never been very good at sitting still. I've always needed to be moving. Whether that be on to the next bigger thing, or walking the dog, or just finding something to do while watching t.v. It's not odd I don't think.

It's hard to explain to people why I feel so unsettled when I am by definition settled. Adjectives just don't do the feeling justice. It's like nails on a chalkboard to me, or chomping ice with super sensitive teeth. Grating.

Most people, when I explain my situation tell me how wonderful life must be. I have absolutely no deadlines, can sleep in all morning, stay our late or go to bed early. I have nothing to do, absolutely no reason to even get out of bed (don't worry, I am. I'm even showering everyday....impressive no?)

So why is it that I am absolutely miserable?

I'm being pulled in three directions but none are strong enough to make me move off the couch. What is my hesitation you ask? No idea. I've got the pros and cons list made for every single place and not a single one sticks out.

My adventures now consist of chasing geese with my dog, and finding long lost tennis balls in the river. Where will my new adventures take me, you ask?

.....as of now, nowhere.


These things that have comforted me, I drive away, This place that is my home I cannot stay, My only faith's in the broken bones and bruises I display